Hello, this is my first time on this chat board. My family just moved to Albquerque in June. And while my 6 yr old has adjusted well, my 9 yr old has not. In fact he has had so many issues with the school and class he is in I am actually praying about homeschooling. I am a sub. teacher working on my elementary ed. degree and find myself really concerned about him socially, academically, and even his overall self-esteem. He is suffering from Anxiety discorder and clinical depression which all came about from our move and anxieties around school. Things are very different here from where we moved from in the Midwest.
I want to be wise and not make any rash decisions. Does anyone have any thoughts or similiar experience.
I just wanted to say that I don't have any direct experience with school based anxiety. However I have a 9 y.o. as well that is somewhat shy and very anxious about even going to school. We've always homeschooled except for a crushing experience in preschool. When I am burnt out on homeschool and even mention school our lives are turned topsy turvy for a few days as we talk about the pros and cons of it. The cons always win and we turn back to our relaxed homeschooling life.
Homeschooling will become a lifestyle change for your whole family as well. One that many families gladly slide into but that others may struggle with. As you are a sub teacher and are going for an education degree, was your goal to stay in the school system? Would your other child stay home as well? I know of some families who have one or two children in school and the others at home - so it is workable.
It sounds like your son would have a huge weight lifted off his shoulders to be able to stay home and learn in a way that is more relaxing and conducive to his learning style. Many homeschoolers have been amazed with the change that comes over their children from the high-stress of school to the calmness of home and learning in their own way. Additionally, some parents have take their children out for a number of years for homeschooling and then the child will return for high school as an example.
Welcome to Albuquerque, we are new as well. We are enjoying what we know of it so far and there are MANY homeschoolers here so you won't be going it alone
Perhaps some other more seasoned homeschoolers will respond to you as well.
pcaffery hello! I am brand new to this site and wanted to familiarize myself with it by reading the posts, intros etc. I felt compelled to offer you encouragement to do what you hear yourself saying inside. I was a certified teacher in MT; taught two years and left because I couldn't afford to live on 19k a year I came here to ABQ and became a member of the police department, APD. I give you all that history because I understand what you are saying. It is a different social climate than what I am used to as well. Our children are 4 and 1. I've begun schooling at home because of interest the oldest has shown. I'm sure this road is going to be a bit bumpy but, I cannot think of a better endeavor if it helps my children. I pray you will be guided by the Lord in a way that is right for your children, too. I feel that a lot of harm can come to a child in school whose experience is such misery. Sometimes our plans are not what His plans are for us I hope you will come to know your intended path and that you will be well equipped for it!! Cindy
Hi there! First of all, you've located a terrific group of people to bounce all of these ideas around with. I think we've all gone through some sort of searching, questioning, research stage that is very stressful and full of unknowns (at first) that leads us each on different paths. You guys are going to be okay . . . I TOTALLY APPLAUD you for thinking deeply and for being a sensitive, in-touch parent. Already, you're in an elite league! HUGS for being a parent who is willing to take an honest look at your situation and search out all of your options. That alone, is going to help your child through this time.
If school is causing great pain in your child's life right now, please know that it is okay to help/empower/nurture your child by making any decision you deem necessary. That's a right we inherit as parents that we can not be stripped of . . . the right to protect. It's not being overprotective, by any means. If your child is crying out for help, it's okay to love him to pieces through this!
The beautiful thing about childhood is that you've plenty of time. It is okay if there is "no learning" for a little while as healing takes place. How can learning occur when one is depressed and anxious? (We wouldn't ask this of an adult!) There is plenty of time . . . healing is the new priority.
Whether or not homeschooling is the right choice for you will become apparent as time goes by. In many cases, parents who chose this path look back and realize they were doing it all along and it's not at all as glamorous as it appears to be on the outside. It's just highly-customized to your life and your child. It is a gift of freedom, not imprisonment. But it definitely does feel like "switching lanes" at first and this can feel unnerving as you do it. Friend, we wish you the best as you move through this process. I just can't tell you how normal this is! You are so normal. HE is so normal. Your sensitivity to him is your intuition trying to get your attention and we commend you for not squealching that voice of truth.
It really would be okay to take a break from public school right now if you chose to. I really hope you'll consider keeping in touch and letting us know if we can do anything to help. There are a lot of nice, experienced homeschoolers here and around town . . . though mine are much younger, people who've posted above such as Carol can really relate to what nine-year-old boys are going through right now and would be a FANTASTIC resource for you.