|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Users Browsing Forum
Googlebot and 3 Guests
|
 Pages: 1 |
 Author |
 Handling Prodding From Relatives/Family Friends (currently 1,063 views) |
| CeltWsdm4 |
| Posted on: January 27th, 2005, 1:06am |
  |
|
Guest User
|
Prodding from relatives or family friends? >
I'm very fortunate to have a supportive extended family, in regard to our decision to homeschool our two kids. However, as the kids get older, some relatives are beginning to "quiz" our kids on various topics. This generally starts out as, "So,....what are you learning in school?" Seems innocent enough. Then, this moves beyond simple conversation into specific questions about history, science, math, geography, etc.
I don't think kids who attend public/private school get this type of scrutiny from relatives/family friends. This goes way beyond small talk. Sometimes, my kids almost don't want to talk with certain relatives, because they feel like they're being tested - due to the fact that they're homeschooled.
Has anyone else experienced this type of behavior from relatives or family friends, either supportive or not? How have/do you handled this? Or, how do you respond when a relative tells your child, "Oh, you *should* know that!" ?  |
|
 Logged |
|
|
|
|
| dallin2001 |
| Posted on: January 27th, 2005, 1:23am |
|
|
Guest User
|
| Turn it around on them. Start questioning them in an area of your choice. Better yet, if your chilidren have pursued a certain area of interest to them, allow them to quiz the offending adult. If they adult asks them a question they don't know the answer to, the kid can respond by asking the adult a question they won't know the answer to. -Kari |
|
| Logged |
|
|
 |
Reply: 1 - 5 |
|
|
| Admin |
| Posted on: January 27th, 2005, 3:58am |
|
|
Posts: 1,794
|
| My mother-in-law does the quizzing thing with Eric. Turning the quiz around on her has been VERY effective! At least, it shuts her up immedately, but the effect doesn't last too long. However, I've found that quizzers usually quiz in their area of expertise (in my MIL's case, this is geography), so you or your kid have to ask back about something else (say, the powers of 2 or the names of the bones in your body!). |
Elizabeth
Mom to Eric (8 ) and Ruby (4.5) |
|
| Logged |
|
|
| |
Reply: 2 - 5 |
|
|
| wardrus |
| Posted on: January 27th, 2005, 5:43am |
|
|
Guest User
|
Oh my! I thought this sort of thing was going to go away. My dks are 7, 5 and 3 and they get this "quizzing" from my in-laws all the time. At first I would do this sort of pre-test with them "when your Auntie asks about... this is what or how you should say" because I really wanted their support and I naively thought this was sincere converstation with my kids. I mean really, even ps kids get "so what are you doing in school" type questions. When recent conversation turned to what their true thoughts were about homeschooling (and our style of raising our kids) I realized that this was a test of my abilities as a mother and how, what, where and when I teach my dks!! At that point I decided it wouldn't matter what my dks said, right or wrong, because they were judging me and the only one I am accountable to is the precious Lord. The last time I let them quiz my kids and I didn't explain, or chime in and I let them just answer "I don't know" and run off. I am secure with our homeschooling decision (and my parenting capabilities) and it didn't matter what they thought about me, my abilities, my kids or their abilities. But I am going to definitly remember to turn the quizzing around when they are a little older and can understand what people are trying to do to them. My .02 is consider the source, the reason and take the higher ground but remember sometimes the higher ground isn't always to prove anything.
Blessings,
Jacque |
|
| Logged |
|
|
|
Reply: 3 - 5 |
|
|
| CeltWsdm4 |
| Posted on: January 27th, 2005, 6:03pm |
|
|
Guest User
|
In the past, when asked: "So, what are you learning?" - my kids would often respond with - "Oh, I don't know. Just the normal stuff." They had no desire to discuss it in detail. I think this may have been cause for alarm for my IL's, possibly prompting the recent barrage of questioning.
It's only been since our kids have gotten older, that this has been happening. My IL's seem to have more expectations now.
I don't want my kids to begin resenting particular relatives because they expect to be questioned when they talk with them. It seems so unfair that this is happening simply because they're home educated, even if our relatives are doing it out of love.
Recently, when my kids began to complain to me about this, I told them to tell questioning relatives what they *are* learning. I told them that maybe they(relatives) are curious and possibly concerned that they're not learning. If they hear what they are learning, in great detail, perhaps they'll ease up a little.  |
|
| Logged |
|
|
|
Reply: 4 - 5 |
|
|
| dallin2001 |
| Posted on: January 27th, 2005, 7:46pm |
|
|
Guest User
|
Another thought: Let them know that you appreciate their interest in your children. However, the way they are going about it is creating anxiety for the children. Tell them that if they are interested in learning what the kids have learned, rather than quizing them, they should open they way for the kids to share what they are interested in, "Tell me about the most exciting thing you have learned since we saw you last." or "Tell me about your favorite area of study and what makes you like it so well." That way you aren't approaching them in a defensive manner, instead you are encouraging them to get to know the unique interests of each of your children.
Another thought: Invite some public schooled friends over to visit while the in-laws are over, and encourage the drilling to begin. I can almost be certain that the PS kids won't know the answers. I have two PS kids.
-Kari |
|
| Logged |
|
|
|
Reply: 5 - 5 |
|
Pages: 1 |
| |
| Forum Rules |
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post polls
You may not post attachments
|
HTML is off
Blah Code is on
Smilies are on
|
|
|
|
Powered by e-blah Platinum 8.3 © 2001-2005 - May 23rd, 2013, 8:06am
|
|
|
Locked Board
